Hi, I suppose.
I've been absent from my blog for quite some time now.
The reason I haven't done anything on here at all after the closing of my YouTube-Channel back then was simply because I honestly forgot about this blog of mine entirely.
Anyways, let me give you a quick recap on what's been going on in my life so far and then let's talk about some future stuff.
I closed down my YouTube-Channel because I felt very unhappy with the course my channel was taking aswell as the quality of my content.
I've always been a very destructive person, so the closure of my channel isn't really a surprise since I have done quick decisions similar like that in the past before.
I've opened up a new channel before I closed down DACFlux and I am actually somewhat still using it. Momentarily it's just a plattform for me to put snippets of unfinished songs I've been working on up on it and comment under videos of other people.
I had to go through a hell lot of troublesome stuff in the timespan of the closure of my channel up to this very moment I am writing this new blog post.
In that timespan I've probably visited doctors and hospitals more than I have all the years before this time combined. I've experienced a gastric juice overflow in my body, which led me to manifest a phobia. I had to learn to be less afraid of having to vomit over a long period of time, aswell as train going to public place and hold out my panic attacks in order to slowly get used to it and make myself realize bit by bit that there is nothing to be afraid of. Either I vomit and that's that or I manage to calm my body down, slow down my heart rate and escape the panic attack (which by the way always caused nausea).
I've been sued by a classmate of mine for threatening him, even though he was the one who came at me and thratened me with physical violence. The policewoman who interviewed me looked through the chatlogs I voluntarely gave her (something he didn't do), which lead her to see both sides and realize that not only I was threatened by him first, but also we kept threatening each other continuesly to no end. Or to put it simple: she realized that I'm not the bad guy, and that in fact in that specific situation neither he and me were the bad guys.
I waited a couple of months until I finally received a beautiful piece of paper on which the judge who went over the details of the case, that there is not enough public interest and thus the case was dropped since the guy who sued me actually never got in contact with the police at all after they interviewed him.
I still have the piece of paper and I actually hung it up on my wall becauses let's face it, when will you ever get such a message?
I am currently in the middle of my finals. In a couple of days everything will be over. Currently, in two days roughly, the first wave of non-written tests will take place.
So basically in a couple of days I will be done with school once again, hopefully get decent grades and hopefully finally manage to find a god damn job with my better considered school report.
Right now I don't do much, I actually didn't even prepare myself when I took the written exams.
All I did so far was reading the new book I have to present in the matter of 5 minutes in 2 days, aswell as refresh my notes for the EUROCOM presentation.
The topic I chose is 'Sloths'. I really love sloths so I thought it was the perfect topic for me to pick and present + since sloths mostly live somewhere around south america (or originated from there?) it has a connection to the topic 'english' and so I was allowed to take that topic and present it in a few days.
Tomorrow I will refresh my knowledge about genetics in biology and the cold war for the history exam.
I honestly have still no clue what's going to happen after I'm done with my finals.
I guess I'll try and find a job or perhaps at least a part-time job so I can make some money, get an income and save up for later.
So yeah, I guess I'll take it slow and easy again, though if I should get a chance, I might consider it.
Wether it'd be a job-offer, a schooling or whatever.
Anyways, so basically I still have no real plans for my future yet, all I want is finally start working and slowly but steadily work towards my dream, which is to leave this god forsaken country known as germany and finally move to japan.
Yeah yeah, I know what you're thinking 'But gee, that's so weeabo-ish' and to that I'll only reply with:
Doofus.
I always wanted to live on a countryside-like place, and after I've seen a couple of pictures of some of the wide open areas in japan I just knew that those are the places I want to live one day. They looked so calm, so quiet and so empty. Perfect in my opinion.
You have to know, I'm the type of person who just wants a calm life. I don't want to party, I don't want action all day long, I just want to sit in the sun, listen to the insects singing their songs of hatred and live as carefree as possible. All I want is barely enough money to live and a calming scenery around the place I live, since ever since I was born I've been living right in front of a damn hospital. Let me tell you, living in front of that gigantic beast is pure horror. Every second night you hear endless screams of woman who give birth, puking, shouting and crying people who are hurt or sick.
Confused people walking around and doing a bunch of loud things in the middle of the night who escaped out of the asylum which is in the same building as the hospital. Many construction-sites all day everyday surrounding me, sirens crying, arguments and fights breaking out, emergencies every minute. It's not a nice place when you all you seek in live is a peaceful atmosphere, that I tell ya.
Anyways, that's it so far. Alot more has happened, but I don't want to go too much in detail about the things happening in my private life, since mostly stressful very private things happened in the timespan I was gone. I'm not sure at the moment if I'll continue with my blog now or if perhaps I'll just give it up. But I do know that I have a goal, and towards that goal I will work as much as I have to in order to reach it. I want to live a quiet and peaceful life, and I will eventually get there, no matter the cost.
